not too much sense

if i remain positive this wont be so bad?

that question haunts me. if i stay positive it wont be so bad right? i'll look on the bright side of the situation, i'll find a silver lining in the cloud. i'll get more energy? i remember growing up my mom would always say these things to me about how you choose your attitude. you choose your health... if you tell yourself you have a headache you'll get one...if you decided to be upset because of a situation you will be in a bad mood....rather than taking the lying.....well you never know this whole thing could be great perspective.
is it better just to lie to yourself, say you'll get better, say you're in a good mood, say you like your job, you like the weather, you're happy with the way you look...does all this self talk help or distroy?

i think this can really only apply in vague situations. for example... if you've been somewhere before and it was terrible don't try and lie to yourself to get you through. or if someone's been a jerk to you before....hmm maybe it'll be different this time? no it wont and yes your time will suck.

i always wonder why i can't be one of those people who doesn't have a problem with anyone. it amazes me. if it's real i want to know how. but i think my cinicsm adds a nice balance. ok so i know this has now stopped making sense and i'm rambling on...don't worry it'll get better. haha probably not.

so this is the week of the big move. i hate packing my stuff up. i love that i get rid of a lot of stuff i don't need and isn't good for anything but i hate the work that's involved. having to strategize so things don't break is not my specialty. this is my first moved as a married person and now i have twice the amount of stuff and good old mom's not here anymore to pack it all up and make everything cleaner than it was in the beginning. i will get through.

i do love change. i love that my paintings will be in different spots. i love that it's a new slate. now only if i could get off my behind and pack.